


my wandering days are over

by likewinning



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Retail, M/M, MY DOG - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-08-21 23:43:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8264759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likewinning/pseuds/likewinning
Summary: And then there were dogs.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i can't begin to justify how much nonsense fluff this is. the phrase MY DOG comes from [this](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1026302), aka the best fic ever.

"Bruce," Jason says. He's trying to be patient, but they've been sitting at the breakfast table for what feels like half a century, and Damian keeps glaring at him and kicking him under the table. Bruce looks over at him and takes another sip of his coffee. He still has half a plate of bacon and pancakes left; Damian and Jason finished their breakfast in seconds.

"Father," Damian says.

"Yes?" Bruce asks. He flips his newspaper over and adjusts his reading glasses.

"Father, if we don't go soon, all the dogs will be _gone_."

Bruce looks at both of them over his glasses. He checks his watch. "It's 8:15," he says. "I doubt the shelter is even open yet."

"They open at 8, Bruce," Jason says. He gathers up his and Damian's plates and takes them to the sink. "I checked."

"Hm," Bruce says. "It looks like it's going to rain today."

" _Bruce_ ," Jason says, at the same time Damian says, " _Father._ "

Bruce sighs and rubs at his beard. He sets his paper down, looks at his watch again, and takes another bite of his pancakes. "All right," Bruce says. "Go get ready, and we'll -"

"We're ready," Jason and Damian both say. Jason all but throws the plates in the dishrack, grabs up Bruce's plate before he's done and scrapes the rest in the trash.

"All right," Bruce says. He stands up, and Damian gets up so fast he knocks his chair over. "All right," Bruce says again. "I suppose we can go."

 

*

 

On the way to the shelter, Damian and Jason talk non-stop about what kind of dog they might get. "Something big," Damian says. "So we can train him to protect us."

"I thought we had Alfred for that," Jason jokes, and Damian scowls at him.

"I think my dog -"

" _Our_ dog," Bruce corrects, and Damian kicks his seat.

" _My_ dog," Damian says. Jason laughs, and Bruce rubs at his eyes and looks over at Jason for some kind of assistance. Jason is no help at all.

 

*

 

It's a madhouse at the shelter. They look at hundreds of different dogs - mutts and chihuahuas, shepherds and yorkies and something Jason swears is a cat in a dog costume before Damian calls them both over to a kennel and says, "Look at _this one_."

"Oh," Jason says. In a kennel by itself is a mangy-looking pitbull, and when Jason gets a little closer he sees that he's missing an eye.

"He's perfect," Damian says. He taps on the plexiglass, and the dog trots over to them and glares up at them with its one eye.

"There are a lot of other dogs," Bruce says, and Jason elbows him. Damian's already talking to one of the attendants to let him meet the dog.

"We call this one Oscar," the attendant says. He takes the dog out on a leash, and they go to a separate room.

"That's an awful name," Damian says. "He's not a puppet."

The attendant looks at them for help, but Jason just laughs and thanks him. They hang out in the room for a while, where Damian tries to get the dog to sit or roll over or do much of anything besides glare at them, but eventually settles for rolling around with the dog and letting it lay on top of him.

"This dog is kind of old," Bruce says.

"That means he's wise," Damian says.

"He's missing an eye," Bruce says.

"Probably a war wound."

"He's -" Bruce says, just as the dog ambles over to him and starts chewing on his shoelace.

"He's _perfect_ ," Damian says. "Let's take him before anyone else can."

"I don't think -" Bruce starts, and Jason clears his throat.

Just as they're walking out of the room, Damian holding tightly to the dog's leash, another attendant nearly barrels into them chasing after the cutest dog Jason's ever seen. It climbs halfway up Jason's leg trying to get away from the girl holding a tiny dog leash and whines at him.

Jason bends down to pet the dog, a tiny boxer with mottled brown and black fur and gigantic eyes, and the dog paws at his lap and sniffs at him. "Oh my god," Jason says. He looks up at the girl - her nametag says Tina - and asks, "Who is _this_?"

"Oh," Tina says. "We haven't even named him yet." She jingles the leash. "He's trouble, though. Barely potty trained and kind of an escape artist."

"Aw," Jason says. He scoops the dog up, and it nuzzles at him and licks his chin. "You're not trouble, are you, little guy?"

"Jay," Bruce says above him, and Jason blinks and looks around, remembers they _picked_ their dog already.

Well - _Damian_ picked _his_ dog.

Jason lets the dog down, and it runs headlong into Damian's dog, sniffing at his legs and trying to nudge it forward. The pitbull blinks its one eye down at the puppy, then glances up at Damian. Damian looks at Jason, then says, "Father."

Bruce sighs. "Yes, Damian?"

"I mean," Damian says. He scoots his dog away from the puppy, and the puppy goes running back to Jason. "I mean, you can't expect Jason and I to _share_ , can you?"

Jason grins. He scoops the puppy up in his arms and holds it in front of Bruce's face. "Come on, B," he says. "You're not gonna make us leave this little guy, are you?"

Bruce looks at Tina, who's been waiting for them to make some kind of decision. "There's a way out of here without seeing the rest of the dogs, right?" he asks. Tina laughs nervously like she's not sure if he's serious.

Jason gets on his tiptoes to kiss his cheek. The puppy licks Bruce's beard, and Bruce scowls at both of them. "Just the two, man, I promise," he says.

_For now_ , he means.

 

*

 

Later - after a two-hour trip to the pet store with both dogs, during which time Jason and Damian look at every dog toy and collar and bed in existence - Jason sits on Bruce's lap in one of the armchairs back home. The puppy - Prince, Jason decided - is curled up in Jason's lap, happily licking his knuckles. Damian's outside with Titus ("It's a _noble_ name," Damian said, "not a Muppet name"), trying to teach him to fetch.

"Sorry if we went a little crazy on you today," Jason says.

"That's all right," Bruce says. He strokes the back of Jason's neck with his thumb, kisses the top of his head. "Damian seems happy, doesn't he?"

"Are you kidding?" Jason laughs. "We're going to have to keep him from trying to sneak that dog to school every day."

"Mm," Bruce agrees. "And you?"

Jason tilts his head to look at him. The crinkles at the corners of Bruce's eyes seem more pronounced today, and when he kisses Jason it's slow and lazy. "I mean," Jason says. "You know you didn't _have_ to say yes, right?"

Bruce laughs, low and warm and right in his ear. Jason shivers, and Prince squirms around in his lap, gets up and paws at Jason's chest. "You know I'd do anything for you, don't you?" Bruce asks, and Jason blushes, but nods. He kind of does, by now.

"Besides," Bruce says. He reaches his hand out to pet Prince. "He's not so bad, is he?" Right on cue, Prince nips at Bruce's fingers. Jason giggles, scoops Prince up and sets him on the ground.

"Did I mention," Bruce says when Jason straddles him and kisses all over his cheeks, his chin, his eyelids, "that animals never seem to like me?"

"Aw, come on," Jason says. "It's cuz you're _gigantic_. Just wait 'til he gets bigger. He'll be your best friend."

Bruce scowls. "Somehow I doubt that." He grabs Jason by the hips, tugs him down and kisses him hard. Jason moans when Bruce nudges his mouth open and sucks on his tongue, then pulls away. "What is it?" Bruce asks.

"Just," Jason says. He rubs at his neck and glances back before looking at Bruce. "Not in front of the dog, okay?"

Bruce groans, lifts Jason off his lap and stands up. He glares down at Prince, who looks up at him and wags his little tail. "I hope you know," Bruce tells the dog. "You are _not_ sleeping in our bed."

He's totally wrong about that.


End file.
